My voice fumbles for words. I can't put socks on or tie my laces without it feeling like a mental battle. Sentences can't be strung together easily. I have forgotten so many things in my memory and my short term memory is shot to pieces. Making a meal seems like a triumph when I have done it. It used to be so automatic.
So this is what a mental breakdown feels like.
So I went to my GP last week, crushed by the stress of work. He gave me a sick note.
I went back this week. He prescribe antidepressants and another sick note. For sure now I will be dismissed from school. Dispatched as a bad teacher when in fact its just a bad time.
Not sure about taking the pills. Surely I can walk this off and leave it behind. On the other side of and at the bottom of that huge cliff. Its bizarre. Some things make me feel really positive down here whilst others make me want to run. Or hide.
Sunlight and clouds all at the same time.